Being so tired I could barely function I went straight home to my bed yesterday. Heated some ready made cottage pie and ate candy from my pillow. Grown up my ass. If im going to be single and shit I can at least live the dream of being completely useless.
Bought 4 books in Sweden Ive been wanting to read for a while. They sit by my bed as little reminders of magic worlds Ill get to step through. After moving here I love reading in swedish, especially writers who properly make the language live. Both Sandra Beijer and Kristofer Ahlstrom are bloggers I love, the Boije af Gennas one is the last in a trilogy about Stockholm that have made me miss home so badly and the Elsie Johansson one looked like it would take me into a proper fairy tale.
Borrowed my mums sunglasses when i was home. Love them. They make me feel like someone who should dance the streets of Paris, drink pink cocktails and care about nothing but pretty clothes. Very far from how I feel at the moment but one day.
One thing I hate about being unhappy is how unattractive you feel. In all aspects. I feel both ugly (nothing fit, all my clothes are old, my hair is dry and brittle and I look tired) and boring. Being sad make your inner light fade and you walk around with the you all turned down. Or at least i do. You meet people and you want to tell them that ‘actually im way more fun than this, you just wait’.
W and me chillin on the bed. He placed his head on my butt and stayed there for the rest of the evening. Felt owned.