Its ok

So many people around me are pregnant right now. Its crazy. At least 8 people somewhat close. Im happy for them. I am. Im still enough of a happy person to genuinely feel joy for each one of them.

But. Mostly im just jealous. So, so jealous. And its such an ugly feeling. I hate it. Its one of the things ive struggled the most with in this journey, how much of an angry, sad and jealous person i have become.

Its a hard feeling to fight though. So i avoid the situations. Stay home. Try and stay away from people. Dont ask questions to my pregnant friends.

But you know what, thats ok. I know that pregnancy is the most important thing to the people going through it but it doesnt need to be for everyone else. You are allowed to NOT have your own life revolve around your friends pregnancies.

Thats why i dont want a baby shower. I dont want the friends of mine that for different reasons are struggling to have to sit through something that hard. And its why i 100% understand those of my friends that dont ask me about my journey or that wont be that interested if i get pregnant. Im sure mine and George parents will be interested enough for all of them 🙂

I think that generally you have to be understanding of your friends. If they dont want to go on couple holidays if they are single, if they dont want to hear about your woes at work if their job is way too different, if they dont want to hear about your pregnancy if they dont have kids themselves or if they dont find pictures of your kids the most important thing in the world.

It ok. Remember that everyone is fighting their own fight. They really are.

On a lighter side, here are some of my screen shots from the last couple of weeks.

This made me laugh so much. This is exactly how i think some opf the weirder traditions in the world started.

Heh, except my dad would love it. I remember in high school when i had my crazy clothes phase (it included pink cowboy hats in net, being french with a baguette under my arm and a massive mens bear coat) and my dad would look at me every morning and slightly confused go ‘so this is what the kids wear these days’

Sorry dad but no, your daughter is just a bit weird…

I mean really…do they?

Haha, that is so Lollo. Poor men that makes a grammar mistake with her…

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